Meaningless Purpose

I'm walking along an unfamiliar street, in an unfamiliar town. Dogs bark in the distance, the occasional car passes by. How did I end up here?

“Hey amigo, you got a smoke?”

How did he end up here? He speaks in a neutral tone, not threatening, just someone looking for comfort in the night. I shake my head and he shrugs, keeps walking in the other direction. We are two ships passing through a pocket of loneliness, almost connecting but not quite.

More dogs. Stars above. Possibly an airplane, although who would be flying at this hour and where would they be going?

Where am I going?

* * *

It wasn't always this way. I used to take care of business during the day, sleep at night... same as everyone else. Somewhere along the way—and who knows where (one minute you're walking along without care, the next you're sliding down some slippery slope)—I got lost.

So here I wander, aimlessly in search of something to search for.

A bus passes. There are three people inside, including the driver. One passenger sits directly behind her, the other sits at the very back, head tilted to the side from not enough sleep or too much booze.

I want to turn around, see where my amigo has gone, but I don't dare. I don't know this place. I don't know these dogs.

* * *

Today will be tomorrow soon. It would be good to stop wandering, but I'm not sure how or what else I would do instead. It's good to have purpose, even of the meaningless sort. Sisyphus and all that.

The stars are beautiful, burning incomprehensibly far from here. They give me something to focus on as I walk with meaningless purpose toward a destination I'm hoping I'll recognize.